".. be necessary to shoot the women."

Tuesday, April 7, 1863, South Carolina Soldier's Home, Richmond

I would have made this entry several days ago except that until now, my hands have been shaking so badly that I have not been able to hold a pen. It happened five days ago and occurred quite near here.

On Thursday last, Adkins and myself, after breakfast with our new friends, Johnston, Sherrer, Gettys and Raterree, left the Home bound for our respective destinations. We had said that during our stay in Richmond we would tie together but that did not last. Adkins and I were going to the South Carolina Depot where Castles, Duncan, Hancock and myself were sent last year to guard stores. Quite in error, I had let slip to Adkins that last year, we had made the aquantances of two women, girls really, named Lily and Hortense.

Adkins had been moving listlessly after our substancial breakfast but upon hearing the women's names, be became all attention and energy. He begged me to take him to the potential land of romance and softness. I tried to explain that after a year, it was not likely that they were still there but Adkins would have none of it. On we went, the pace gathering speed as we came closer to the same destination for different reasons. Adkins was looking to make a conquest. I was now looking for a place to sit and rest. I am not forty any more.

As we made our way along Fourteenth, we heard in the not to far distance which we took for a great commotion. As the Yankees were dozens of miles away, we dismissed the sounds as being of no consequence. His mind and my body had better things to do. I was regretting ever having mentioning anything about women to Adkins.

At last, we came to Main and walked, almost running at the double-quick, to the Depot. The sounds we had heard and ignored were getting louder and we could tell that they were angry. Hard by was the building for the Georgia Hospital and Relief Association. I had to rest as Adkins was eager to enter the Association building, saying that he was ready to storm some breastworks. I think I remember being like him when I was his age. Martin van Buren was President as I recall.

Our attentions were quite quickly interrupted by the sounds of soldiers marching towards us from our opposite direction. There were no bands or flags. Adkins said this was no parade. A lieutenant, breathing hard, saw us and called, "You men, draw muskets and ammunition from the Depot and fall in! Quickly now!" A private inside the Depot gave us what we needed and we ran to catch up to the column. 

I asked the soldier next to me what was going on. He said, "Riot. We are to put it down."
A riot! By whom? We are at war for our freedom. A civil disturbance does no good for our cause and only helps the enemy to further his tyranny over us. If these were our own brother soldiers at the root of this riot, this is treason. These people are traitors and they must be shot. 

We were ordered to halt. The sounds were loud and full of venom against our government. We could see a mob and it was getting closer. I saw and struggled to comprehend what my eyes told me. The mob was almost all women. They were calling for bread and other foodstuffs but it was mostly bread. They cried of hunger and starvation and want. They were badly dressed and darkly thin.

I did not understand. Our breakfast that morning at the Home was filling if not fancy. We had quite enough. Why do these hard people facing us not eat? Why do we feast while they famine? I could not think for long for that lieutenant said that the President was coming.

We saw him. He was mounted but not richly so for him being our President. His manner of dress was similiarly modest. The lieutenant said that if the President could not quell the mob, it would be necessary to shoot the women. It would be an uneven contest. We had muskets with bayonets; they had knives and hatchets. If we fired, certainly we would win, and in winning, we would be lost.

President Davis addressed them but I was too far away to hear the words. It looked as if he reached into his pocket and threw something to the mob. It looked to be coins. The tensemess of the situation continued for several minutes before the mob melted away. We did not not have to open fire upon the women. We were marched back whence we came. The lieutenant discharged us at the Depot with thanks for doing our duty. Had we been ordered to shoot the women, I might have instead shot him.

We turned in our muskets and cartridge boxes at the Depot and had no further interest in Lily, Hortense or any other women. We went to the nearby Reading Room to forget what we had seen and quell our nerves. This we could not do so we went to the Metropoloton Hall to the the McCarthys play. Even that musical immersion did not remove our minds from our troubles. We returned to the Home where I tried to sleep. I do not remember anything from that day to this one. Why does a nation of farmers starv